If Rachel Went To Paris
by ISwearAngelWasThere
Summary: What if Ross and Phoebe gave up after realizing they were at the wrong airport? What if Rachel never got off the plane?
1. Chapter 1

**Okay so this is my first Friends story. originally everything was in the past tense for the first chapter so I fixed that now after almost a year. Anyway I hope you enjoy this story!**

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"Flight 421 leaves at 8:40."

"Yes! That's what I have! It's not on the board."

"Well that's what it says here. Flight 421, leaves at 8:40, Newark Airport."

"What?"

"Newark Airport. Why? Where are you?"

"JFK."

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The whole ride home, Ross is quiet. He doesn't even bother to tell Phoebe to be more careful as she drives the cab recklessly down the highway. He doesn't say anything to her when she pulls the cab in front of his building. He get out, goes inside, and climbs the stairs to his apartment.

Once he is inside, he tries to go to sleep. He just wants to forget this ever happened. However, much to his frustration, sleep refuses to come. So he starts thinking, and replaying the events of the night in his head.

He feels like an idiot. Why did he think this would succeed? These things only work out in those stupid romantic movies that Chandler pretends not to like. The guy falls in love with the girl, does something stupid to lose her, then shows up at just the right time in just the right place, (and definitely not at the wrong airport) and the girl—seeing that he's made a big romantic gesture—decides to take him back, and everyone is happy.

Ross should have known that's not how real life worked. In real life, that sort of plan always gets messed up one way or another and there's nothing you can do about it. She probably wouldn't have felt the same as him anyway. At least not enough to give up her amazing new job in Paris.

But that isn't even what bothers him the most. The worst part is that even though she might've just told him she didn't feel the same way and gotten on the plane, she also might've told him she loved him too and kissed him right there in the airport. Then Rachel and Emma would move back in and they could be a real family. If he had just made it to the airport at least he'd know what would've happened. Now he'll be left wondering for the rest of his life.

Even though he and Rachel have had a lot of issues as a couple and haven't actually dated in years, there was always a part of him that thought they would be together in the end. But now that little bit of hope is gone. Now that Rachel is on that plane, it's too late. It's not like Ross can tell her how he feels after she moves. She'll already be living there. It was probably too late even tonight. The arrangements have already been made, she's already taken the job and found a place to live.

It's so irritating. Every time he thinks it was going to work with him and Rachel, something always ruins it. Being on a break, Joey accidentally proposing to Rachel, and a cat jumping on Ross' head are just a few examples. And now he can add going to the wrong airport to that list. Maybe the universe just doesn't want them to be together.

Eventually, Ross starts to doze off. He thought that falling asleep would make everything go away, but he has a restless sleep and spends the whole night dreaming about Rachel and what could've happened.


	2. Chapter 2

**Wow. It's been a long time since I updated this! Sorry it took so long. I've been kinda busy and I've also been working on an original story lately so I haven't been on here too much. But today I found this story again and I realized that I should work on it more so I finished the second chapter. (It was almost done for awhile but I didn't get around to finishing it.) Hopefully I'll get back into writing for this story now but updates will still probably be kinda slow. (But not nearly as long as this one took.) Also I know that the first chapter is in past tense and this in present but since I last worked in this story I've started not liking to write in past tense so I changed it. If anyone knows how to change the first chapter please tell me because I can't figure it out. Also thanks to everyone who suggested new titles but I couldn't pick one because I like all of the ideas so I'm just keeping this one for now. Anyway I hope you like the second chapter!**

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Rachel is exhausted. The flight to Paris is long and uneventful. She spends most of it staring out the window even though there isn't much to see since they are above the clouds and it is dark.

She doesn't remember falling asleep but the next thing she knows she's startled awake by the wheels of the plane hitting the runway and causing her to bounce slightly and hit her head on the top of her seat. Her eyes snap open and she is surprised to see bright sunlight coming in through the windows. She'd forgotten that it would be about 10:00 in the morning in Paris by the time she arrived.

She lays her head back against her seat as the plane makes its way towards the gate and eventually people begin to stand up and grab their bags from under their seats or from the overhead compartments. Still half asleep, Rachel slowly lifts herself up and gets her bags.

Once she steps out of the airport into the fresh air she feels much more awake. As she walks around the front of the building looking for a cab she can't help but notice how much warmer and sunnier it is here than it was in New York when she left.

She smiles as she gets into the cab. She had been having doubts about taking this job. Moving to France would be hard and she knows that. It's almost crazy, leaving her home and her friends, going to a completely new country, barely speaking the language. The hardest part would be leaving Emma and Ross. That was what she had been most worried about. She would have to be away from her baby much more than she's used to and she wasn't sure she could handle that.

But now that she's here she is so glad she that she is. She didn't realize how much she'd wanted this. She'd almost wondered if she was making some crazy big mistake. There are other jobs—good ones —that she could get back in New York. That doesn't mean she has to go back to her old one, there are other options. But she was just trying to convince herself that because of how much easier it would be to stay.

But this is what she wants and she's sure of it now. She's always wanted to see other countries and getting to live in one and work in fashion is the best thing that could ever happen to her. She's so glad that she took this job!

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Hours later Rachel's lying in the bed of her new apartment. In Paris! Most of her stuff hasn't arrived yet but she knows even before it's decorated and fully furnished that she loves it. She has a pretty nice view of the city and it's in a good neighborhood. It's really late. About 1:00 in morning. Rachel knows that in the morning she has to get up and start her first day, but she just can't fall asleep. She's feeling so many different emotions. Mostly excitement mixed in with nervousness, anticipation, and some other things.

After a few more moments Rachel gives up and goes to the phone. There's no way she's getting to sleep. She dials Monica and Chandler's number hoping that with the time difference everyone will be there hanging out and she can talk to them. She really misses them all already.

After the first few rings Monica answers

"Hello."

"Hi!"

"Rachel!" Monica shouts excitedly. Rachel can hear her telling everybody else who it is. "How are you? How's Paris!?"

Rachel smiles. "It's amazing! It's even better than I thought! I really can't wait to start work! But I miss you guys so much already!"

"We miss you too!" Monica says. "Everyone's here if you wanna talk to them."

"Oh that'd be great!" Says Rachel. She gets to talk to Joey, Chandler, Phoebe, and even Mike who happens to be there helping Monica and Chandler pack for their move the next day. Eventually the phone gets handed back to Monica.

"Well," she says. "That's everyone who's here."

"Wait." Says Rachel. "What about Ross?"

"He's not here. We haven't seen him all day." Monica pauses. "Actually last night when you were—" She stops and there's whispering. After a moment Monica continues. "He's just been busy today I guess. But we'll tell him you said hi."

"Oh okay." Rachel says hesitantly. "Tell him I miss him!" After that they talk a little more and then decide to say goodnight.

Rachel goes back to bed and finally starts to fall asleep. Her conversation with Monica about Ross left her rather confused. She gets the feeling there's something Monica isn't telling her. It's probably not important. She's sure that Ross is fine. She shouldn't dwell on it. She has to get to sleep before work. She can't wait.

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 **Thanks to everyone who reveiwed the first chapter! (That's the most reveiws I've ever gotten for one chapter!) Please tell me what you think of this one!**


	3. Chapter 3

**I know again I took forever to update. I'm really sorry. I had no inspiration for this for a while. But now I've started watching Friends a lot more again so I had a lot of inspiration. I know I keep saying this, but I really am going to try to update more this time. I think I'll try for once a month or every other month. I'm a very slow writer as you can probably tell. Thanks to all the people who followed, favorited, and reveiwed. it really means a lot to me that people seem to be enjoying this so far. Sorry that this one is a little short, but now that I have an idea of where this is going I think the chosters will start to get better and longer. I hope you enjoy this one! Please tell me what you think! (Also sorry for any typos I'm a terrible editor.)**

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Two days after Rachel got on the plane, Ross finally manages to pull himself together. Well, not really. He's still miserable. He still feels like an idiot. But at least he's dressed and actually leaving his apartment. That's progress.

He's going to Rachel's mother's house to say goodbye to Emma before she goes to Paris to be with Rachel in a few days. They decided that Emma would stay with Rachel's mother until the flight so that way, she could just take Emma straight to the airport, but Ross is going to spend the morning with her since he won't be seeing her for a while.

After a ride there with way too much traffic and some awkward small talk with Rachel's mom, (He's pretty sure she doesn't like him all that much after the whole "we were on a break" situation.) he and Emma are off to spend the morning together.

First they go to a nearby park. Almost immediately Ross puts her in a swing and starts pushing her lightly. Despite her mother's hatred of swings, Emma has really gotten to like them.

Ross has to admit, even though he's still upset about everything that happened with Rachel, it does feel good to get out and spend time with his daughter. He's glad to have Emma with him. She's a good distraction. He smiles and she starts to laugh while she goes up and down on the swing.

After a little while Emma starts to get fussy, so Ross lifts her up and carries her to a bench. She's tired now, and seems perfectly content to fall asleep right there in his arms, seemly unaware of all city noise around her.

He watches her for a few minutes. Emma makes him so happy. Even though these past few days have been awful, she managed to make him smile. He's going to miss her so much. He knows it's not forever. It probably won't even be that long. Rachel's company has offered to help pay for the transportation so that Emma can be with both of her parents. But Ross has never gone this long without her. Even when she and Rachel moved in with Joey, they were always just across the street.

But now he won't be able to just go and see her whenever he wants. He'll have to wait until she comes back to America. It's so hard for him to imagine that after Emma leaves tomorrow, the two girls who he loves most in the world will be so far away from him. That's a horrible thought. He really has no idea how he's going to deal with that. Eventually he gets up and he and Emma go to have lunch together one last time before she leaves.

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After lunch he drops Emma back off at her grandmother's house. He would've like to spend longer with her, but she needs to rest before the flight. It will be leaving at 5:30 in the morning and it's her first time on a plane so she won't get much sleep.

Saying goodbye to Emma is hard, but Ross manages to do it. He's emotionally exhausted after it though, and just wants to go home and sulk like he's been doing for the past few days, but he can't. Today is the day that Monica and Chandler are moving and he promised he'd be there to help them load the moving truck and go with them to their new house. Joey, and Phoebe will also be there.

He really doesn't feel like seeing his friends. He knows they will all ask him if he's okay, and how he's doing. But he doesn't want to talk about that. He doesn't know what to say. He's not really sure how he's doing or if he's okay. This is very hard for him. Rachel leaving is hard enough, but how stupid he feels after trying to stop her makes it even worse. His friends pitying him will not help. But he knows how important this is to Monica and Chandler, so instead of going into his building, goes across the street and upstairs to Monica's apartment for the last time.

When Ross gets there, his friends are all gathered over by the counter, putting their keys down, since they won't need them anymore. When Ross walks in they look surprised at first. Then Chandler walks over to Ross and gives him a hug.

"Hey." He says. "We thought you weren't coming. You know, after everything with Rachel the other day."

Ross nods. "Yeah, well I couldn't miss this. You guys are moving today. I had to be there."

Monica smiles. "You sure you're okay to come? You don't have to."

"Nah." Ross says. "I'm fine. Here's my key by the way." He takes the key off his key chain and places it on the counter next to the other four.

"You're sure?" Phoebe asks. "You seemed really upset the other night."

"Yes. I'm fine." Ross says, even though he really isn't. "Let's go see the new house."


	4. Chapter 4

**Yay! It took me less than five months to update! I'm writing a lot more lately so hopefully updates will keep being faster. Sorry if this chapter is a little weird. I don't know why, but I feel like it is. Also I feel like Rachel might be a little out of character, but it kind of makes sense because she probably would be a little off after moving to another country. Anyway I hope you enjoy this chapter.**

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Rachel walks out the door of her new office building smiling so wide that people on the street probably think she's drunk or something. Her first day at her new job was everything she'd hoped it would be and more.

The work she's doing is amazing. Working in fashion in France was already a dream of hers, but this is even better than she imagined. It's even better than what she was doing at Ralph Lauren, plus she's making more money. She had worried it would be hard to communicate with her coworkers. That was one thing she was very nervous about, actually. The only French she knows is what she learned in high school and she's pretty sure she tuned a lot of that out. But most of the people in her department speak good English. She can't believe how perfect everything is turning out!

She wanders down the city street, looking at everything around her. Paris is beautiful. She realizes she has no idea what she's going to do for dinner. She has no food in her apartment since she just moved in and she doesn't really know any of the restaurants in the area. She decides to just walk around until she finds something.

An hour later she's back at her apartment with a to-go box of some sort of pasta dish and a salad. She should've been back from getting dinner sooner, (her apartment is only a ten minute walk from work) but she took her time walking through the city. She loves it here. She can't believe this is real life.

Of course she still misses New York. She's trying not to let herself think about that, but it's true. She misses living with Joey, and having Monica and Chandler across the hall. And Phoebe and Mike. And Ross and Emma.

Especially Ross and Emma. Of course Emma will be coming in the late afternoon tomorrow, but it's still the longest Rachel's ever been away from her baby. There were times when Emma was on the other side of a room and Rachel missed her. Now she's in another country.

And Ross too. She's not sure when she'll see him again. She wishes they could've talked on the phone the other night. But Ross does have a life of his own. Like Monica said, he was probably busy. He was probably working. Or maybe he was visiting Ben. Yeah. He hasn't seen Ben in a while. That was probably it. She'll try to call him once Emma gets here. He'll probably want to know how she's doing after her first plane ride.

After dinner, Rachel pushes all thoughts of Ross and New York to the back of her mind. She loves it in Paris. She just needs a little time to adjust to not seeing her friends everyday. That is how her life was for nearly ten years. It makes sense that she needs some time. But she still has no doubt in her mind that this was the right decision. She needs a fresh start at a new job. And this is definitely the best place to do it.

She doesn't have a trash can in her apartment yet so she goes and looks in her building until she finds a room with a trash chute. There's a man already there, about her age. He has dark hair and blue eyes. He puts a garbage bag in and steps aside letting Rachel pass him. She watches him walk out and notices that his key fell out of his pocket. She tries as hard as she can to think of how to tell him in French but can't remember.

"You dropped your keys!" She says, hoping that he speaks some English.

He turns around and smiles. "Thanks." He says picking them up. Rachel notices that he has an American accent.

"Oh good!" She says. "You speak English. You know, because a lot of French people don't. I thought you would just keep walking."

He laughs. "Yeah, well I'm from New York. So I speak English. I actually know very little French."

"Oh" Rachel says, "I'm from New York too! I just moved here."

The man smiles. "Oh really? That's funny."

"Yeah."

"I'm Nick Ramano." He says.

"Rachel Green." Rachel answers, shaking his hand.

Nick smiles. "Hey, you wanna hang out sometime? It's really nice to meet someone from New York. I miss New York."

Rachel smiles hesitantly. "Yeah. That might be nice."

Nick laughs. "Okay I just realized that it totally sounded like I was asking you out. I'm not."

"Oh." Rachel says a little disappointed. She had thought he was asking her out. It would've been nice to go on a date. But it would also be nice to have a friend. She misses her friends back home. It would be great to have a friend here.

"Don't get me wrong." Nick says. "You're beautiful. And you seem really great. It's just that I have a boyfriend."

"Oh."

"Yeah. And so, you know, if I dated you, he'd get all mad and then I'd have to deal with that." He laughs awkwardly.

Rachel smiles awkwardly back. "Yeah."

"So now that you know that I'm gay, do you still wanna hang out?"

"Yeah." Rachel smiles. "I don't have a problem with it. I think it would be nice. Especially since you're from New York. It'll be good to know there's someone else here from home."

"Exactly!" Nick says. "We moved here 'cause Matt—that's my boyfriend—got a job here and I really miss it. So, yeah, I think we're going to be friends," He starts to walk out the door. "I'll see you later."

"Bye." She waves.

Rachel smiles to herself as she walks back to her apartment. She can't believe how well this is going!

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 **Please reveiw if you liked this one (or didn't). I really like hearing what you think or if you have any suggestions. The next chapter should be up soon.**


	5. Chapter 5

**Here's chapter five. It's shorter than I thought it would be, but the next few chapters will probably be longer because more things will be happening. I hope you like it! Please tell me what you think!  
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It's been three weeks since Rachel got on the plane. Ross thought he would be over it by now, but he really isn't. Well, he's doing better and it's not like he spends all his time moping around and thinking about Rachel, but he still misses her.

His friends have noticed his change in attitude. He seems very down a lot of the time. Almost like when he broke up with Carol. They've been trying everything they can to cheer them up. Today they are all sitting in the living room of Monica and Chandler's new house. Because Monica, Chandler, and the babies moved out of the city and they see each other a lot less, Monica decided to have everyone over for dinner at least once a week.

Now they are sitting together after enjoying one of Monica's lasagnas. The babies are with them too. Jack is asleep in Chandler's arms while Phoebe holds Erica. Ross is staring into space while everybody else talks. It's not until Chandler says his name that he actually starts listening to the conversation.

"What?" he asks, slightly dazed.

"I asked if you've heard from Rachel lately." Chandler answers.

"Yeah." Ross nods. "She calls every week or so to let me talk to Emma and tell me how they're doing. Have you talked to her?"

Monica nods. "She's called a few times. I think she misses New York, but she sounds like she really loves her new job."

Ross looks down at his lap.

"You still sad about her leaving?" Phoebe asks.

"Well, yeah." Ross says. "I guess I probably should be over it by now. If she felt the same way she wouldn't have gone in the first place. But it really bothers me that I'll never know for sure."

"Why don't you just ask her?" Joey asks.

Ross looks at him, confused. "What do you mean? I can't just ask her! She's already living in another country! If I asked her she would probably just say she didn't feel the same way and it would be awkward, especially over the phone." He says.

"So go to Paris." Joey says.

"You're kidding. Right?" Ross asks.

"No!" Joey says. "Go to Paris and tell her how you feel. What's the worst that could happen?"

"She could tell me she doesn't feel the same way!"

"So?"

"So, then it will be awkward and I'll hate myself for ruining our friendship!"

Joey rolls his eyes. "You'll hate yourself even more if you never find out how she feels."

"No, Joey." Ross says firmly. "I'm done with all the stupid romantic gestures. It hasn't gotten me anywhere. If anything it's made my life harder."

"But-" Joey starts.

"No." Ross says. "Now can we please just talk about something else?"

Joey looks like he wants to say something else, but Phoebe, sensing the tension, jumps in with a story about some lady who she met at the piano bar while Mike was playing and they all move on from any more conversations about Rachel.

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Later that night, Ross is staring blankly at the TV, thinking about what Joey said. At first he thought it was stupid. But he still can't get it out of his head. Maybe it's not so crazy. But it is crazy. It's a crazy idea. Go to Paris and tell her how he feels. There is no way that will turn out well. Going to another country to tell someone you love them will just scare them away.

Except when he went to London see Emily. That worked out. After that they fell in love and got married. Of course that marriage did not end well, but that was only because he said the wrong name at the altar. Rachel's name. He said Rachel's name at his wedding with Emily. He married Rachel in Vegas. Everything seems to lead him to Rachel. That has to mean something!

Still, the even when it almost works with Rachel, it doesn't. It never works. He always messes it all up. Yeah, going to see her in Paris is a stupid idea. She loves her new job. She loves her new life. A life that doesn't include being with him. He needs to get used to that idea. She's not going to come back and she's not going to be with him. It's too late.

But even so, Joey's words keep running through is head. "You'll hate yourself even more if you never find out how she feels." It's true. Isn't it? This is going to drive him crazy until he knows. And if she shoots him down, oh well. At least he'll know. He needs to know. And so, against his better judgement, Ross gets up and goes to pack a bag.


	6. Chapter 6

**Okay this took a while for some reason. I wanted to post this chapter on April 21st because that would be one years since I started this story, but I got realky busy and didn't know how I wanted to write it so I'm doing it now. Anyway I hope you like this chapter! I know I keep saying this, but the next one will probably be longer. Anyway please tell me what you think!**

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Emma giggles happily as Rachel lifts her out of her crib. Rachel smiles back at her and sits her in a high chair.

Rachel is happy that Emma seems to be adjusting well to her new home. Emma is very easy going for the most part and doesn't seem to mind the change. She's just as happy as she was in New York and other than being very jet lagged and cranky on her first day, Emma seems to like Paris.

Rachel wonders sometimes if Emma really remembers New York. She's a little more than one and a half but Rachel isn't sure how far back babies can remember at that age. She definitely remembers Ross though. When they talk on the phone Emma smiles and tries to take the phone from Rachel, like she's trying to get closer to her father. Rachel wishes Ross and Emma could see each other more. Maybe sometime in the next few weeks she'll ask him to come and visit her. They haven't made any plans about when he and Emma can see each other yet. They both agreed that they should give Emma time to settle into her new life.

She really seems like she has gotten used to it. They have a routine. In the morning, Rachel gets Emma up and feeds her and gets her dressed, then goes to work. Her company offered to pay for a nanny for Emma. The nanny, a woman in her mid twenties named Isabelle, is very nice and Emma seems to love her. Rachel feels very comfortable leaving Emma with her. Then at night, Rachel comes home and spends the evening playing with Emma or watching TV while Emma falls asleep in her lap.

Nick, as it turns out, lives in an apartment down the hall. Some nights he comes over and plays with Emma. Though he won't admit it, he's very good with children and he and Emma have quickly become friends.

Rachel has also gotten to know Nick's boyfriend, Matt. Matt is like Nick's opposite. He's shy and serious while Nick is loud, outspoken, and anything but serious. Rachel doesn't really understand how they ever ended up together.

So far, Nick and Matt are her only friends outside of work, and so she spends most of her time off with them, or with Emma. She takes most weekends off to be with Emma. Sometimes they take walks with Emma in her stroller. Rachel's also trying to find some sort of play group for Emma so that she can meet some kids her age, but so far she hasn't found one.

Nick has decided that every Friday night he's going to take Rachel out to do something fun. That's what she's getting ready to do now. She has to feed Emma and put her to sleep before she leaves. Isabelle will be over any minute to watch her.

The door opens and Nick walks in without knocking, making Rachel jump.

"Hey." He says.

"Hey. You just don't knock do you?" She asks.

Nick rolls his eyes. "What's the point? I knew you'd let me in. If I knocked you'd have to walk all the way to the door. I'm just saving time."

Rachel laughs. "In what world does that make sense?"

Nick groans. "I just had this same conversation with Matt. I'm not having it again."

"Whatever." Rachel says. "I'm almost ready to go. I just have to feed Emma and then we have to wait for Isabelle."

Nick picks up Emma. "Hey Emma." He says and she smiles.

"What are you doing?" Rachel says, slightly annoyed. "I'm trying to feed her!"

"I'm just saying hi." Nick smiles down at Emma. "Right Emma?" He bounces her up and down and she giggles. "Yeah. You get it."

There's a knock at the door and Rachel looks up. "That's Isabelle. Can you get it? I'm getting Emma's food ready."

"Sure." Nick says. He walks over to the door with Emma in his arms. When he opens the door he frowns.

"Who are you?" He asks.

Rachel joins him in the doorway. "Ross?" She asks, surprised.


	7. Chapter 7

**I know I keep saying this but I'm sorry that this took so long and that its so short. Ive been really busy and I didn't really have much inspiration. The next one will hopefully be up within the week and will probably be longer. I hope you like this one! Please tell me what you think!**

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Ross says nothing for a moment. He looks back and forth between Emma in Nick's arms and Rachel. He doesn't know what to think.

Who is this guy and why is he holding Ross's baby? That's the first thought that comes to mind. Then he realizes he should probably say something.

"Hey!" He says, trying to sound happy and not at all confused and uncomfortable. "Uhh. Surprise!"

Rachel looks uncomfortable. "Ross? What are you doing here?"

"Well," Ross says, desperately trying to think of something to say other than 'I came here to tell you I love you only to find you here with another man.' "I...uhh...I came to surprise Emma! Yeah. I wanted to see how she's doing in her new home!"

"Oh." Rachel says. "Okay. Come in."

Ross comes in and closes the door behind him. "So," He says gesturing to Nick. "Who's this?"

"Oh! Right!" Says Rachel. "Ross, this is Nick Ramano. Nick, this is Ross Geller, Emma's father."

Nick smiles. "Oh. So you're Emma's dad. Nice to meet you!" He looks down awkwardly for a moment. "I guess you probably want to hold her then. Here."

He hands Emma over to Ross. Ross gives her a big hug and she squeals.

"Hi Emma!" He says. "Oh, I missed you so much!" Despite the uncomfortable situation, Ross really is happy to see his daughter. She smiles up at him and for a moment he forgets about everything that's going on. That is until Nick starts talking.

"So," Nick says, "Rachel and I were gonna get some dinner. Do you wanna come?"

Ross would rather do anything else in the world. Literally anything.

"That's okay." He says, trying not to show how much he really doesn't want to go. "I wouldn't want to get in the way."

"No it's really fine, Ross. We don't mind." Rachel says.

Ross shakes his head. "No. I'll just stay here." He says. "I mean, someone's gotta watch Emma. Right?"

"Well, actually," Rachel says. "Her nanny should be here to watch her any minute."

"Well then call her and cancel!" Ross insists.

Eventually, Rachel agrees to let Ross stay with Emma and, after calling Isabelle and telling her not to come, she and Nick leave the apartment.

Once they leave, Ross immediately puts Emma down in her playpen and picks up the phone. It rings three times before he hears Joey's voice on the other end.

"Hello?"

"Hi Joey." Ross says.

"Oh. Hey Ross!" Joey says. "How's it goin'? Did you tell her how you feel?"

Ross rolls his eyes. "No Joey. No I did not."

"Why not?" Joey asks.

"Because she's going out with another man!"

"What? What do you mean?" Joey suddenly sounds concerned.

"I mean when I got here she was about to go on a date with some guy!" Ross shouts into the phone.

"Calm down." Joey says. "Are you sure they're dating? Maybe he's like...her uncle or something."

"No Joey! He's not her uncle! That doesn't even make sense! They're obviously dating and you convinced me to do a very stupid thing! I should've stayed home!" Ross sighs. Emma has started crying.

"I have to go." He says. "Emma's crying."

Ross hangs up the phone and goes to pick Emma up. He holds her until she calms down and then remembers that Rachel mentioned that she needed to be fed. So he feeds her and eventually puts her in her crib.

Once he's alone, he turns on the TV. The only thing he can find is some French cooking show. He doesn't care. He just needs to take his mind off the fact that Rachel is having dinner with another man on the same day that he spent seven hours on a plane to tell her that he loves her. Eventually he falls asleep with the TV still on.


	8. Chapter 8

**I posted this chapter yesterday but then decided that I didn't like the ending. So if you saw this yesterday the end is different. Anyway, thanks to the people who followed and favorited the story. It really makes me happy to know that people like it.**

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By the time Rachel gets back from dinner with Nick, it's around 11:00 at night. After dinner, they went to some play that Nick said sounded good, only to leave at intermission when they found out it was entirely in French. They ended up going to some coffee shop not too far from their building and hanging out there for a while.

Rachel is tired after working all day and going out with Nick. She's ready to immediately flop into her bed and go to sleep. When she opens the door, she jumps when she sees Ross asleep on the couch with the TV on.

If she's being honest, she almost completely forgot that Ross had shown up. She thinks that it's a little weird that he came without any warning. He just showed up at her door.

She's sure it must be hard to be away from Emma for that long. She's pretty sure she couldn't do it. But this just seems so out of the blue. He didn't mention visiting when they talked on the phone five days ago. But all of a sudden he's here. And he seems off. Maybe he was just jet lagged when he got there. Or maybe he was uncomfortable because he doesn't know Nick.

He'll probably feel better in the morning. Rachel decides not to wake him up. They'll talk about his sudden visit in the morning before she goes to work. She's too tired to deal with it right now.

Unfortunately for her, Ross doesn't seem to have the same idea, because he hears her close the door and sits up. He yawns and turns off the TV.

"Hey." He says. "You're back."

She nods. "How's Emma?"

"She's fine." Ross says, smiling a little. "I fed her and then she slept most of the night."

"That's good." Rachel says. She's surprised by how uncomfortable this conversation is. She and Ross have known each other for most of their lives and while their relationship hasn't always been easy, they've always been able to talk to each other. But right now it feels like they don't know how to act around each other. Something is definitely up with Ross.

"Well," She says, deciding that whatever it is can wait until the morning, "I'm gonna go to bed."

Ross nods. "Okay."

Rachel starts walking to the bathroom to brush her teeth when Ross starts talking again.

"So that Nick guy seems nice." He says.

She nods, confused. "Yeah. He is."

"I didn't expect him to be here." Ross says.

"Well," Rachel says. "I wouldn't have made plans with him if I knew you were coming. You didn't tell me you were coming."

"Oh. I know." Ross says. "Sorry about that. I just really wanted to see Emma so I came. But I didn't expect you to have plans with some guy."

"What do you mean?" Rachel asks. She doesn't really like the way he said that. She doesn't understand why he'd be upset about her having plans when he showed up completely unannounced. "Why wouldn't I have plans?"

"I don't know." Ross says. "I mean, you just moved here and you're already going out and having dinner with guys? I just thought you'd still be settling in with Emma. That's all." He smiles slightly.

"What do you mean 'with guys?'" Rachel asks. The annoyance in her voice is clear. Why is it any of Ross's business who she has dinner with?

"You know," Ross says. "I was just surprised that you're going out with guys already."

Rachel frowns and walks back over to the couch. "What's wrong with me having dinner with somebody?" She's a little angry now. Ross has no right to be commenting on the fact that she had dinner with a friend.

"Well, I mean, you just got here. You just got a new job and you moved to a totally new country with our daughter and now all of a sudden you're going out and dating guys?"

Oh. Ross thinks she and Nick are dating. All of the things Ross is saying make a lot more sense now.

"Ross." Rachel says.

Ross ignores her. "You don't think that's a little soon? I'm just a little surprised that you haven't even lived here a month and you're already dating."

"Ross." She says again, this time a little more forcefully.

"No." He says. "I'm just saying that you just left New York and you're—"

"Ross!" Rachel yells.

"What?"

"He's gay!"

Ross stares at her. "What?"

"Nick. He's gay. He's dating a man. He and I are not dating."

Ross laughs uncomfortably. "Oh. Yeah." He looks down at the floor. "Of course he's gay! Right. Okay then. Well, I think I'm gonna go to bed now."

Rachel sighs as she watches Ross get the couch ready to sleep on. There is definitely something up with him. Why would it matter to him whether or not Nick is gay? It shouldn't bother him if they really were dating.

"Wait a minute." Rachel says. "Why would you care who I'm dating?"

Ross looks up. "What?" He says. "I don't."

Rachel rolls her eyes. "You clearly do. You got all upset when you thought we were dating!"

"No, no." Ross says, clearly not wanting to have this conversation. "I was just curious. You know, about your new life in Paris."

"You weren't curious! You were actually upset! It isn't any of your business who I'm dating!"

"No. I was just a little surprised that you were going out with guys so soon after moving here."

Rachel groans. "But that's not your problem! I can date whoever I want! If Nick and I really were dating, that would be okay!"

"I didn't say it wasn't!" Ross yells back at her.

"Yes. You did!" Rachel shouts. "You were acting like it wasn't okay for me to go on a date! You don't get a say in whether or not I go on dates! I'm not dating you!"

Ross doesn't answer for a moment. Then he sighs. "No. You're right. You're not. I'm sorry."

Rachel goes into her bedroom after that and closes the door. She doesn't brush her teeth or change clothes. She doesn't want to walk through the living room on her way to the bathroom. She doesn't want to see Ross right now. She doesn't understand what is going on with him.

The two of them have gone through some times where they didn't get along, but she thought things were going well between them lately. At least they were before she left New York. She doesn't know why he's suddenly acting like this. It's not even that she's angry at him. She was pretty annoyed when he was acting like her dating life was his business, but after sitting on her bed for a few minutes and calming down, she's really not angry. Just confused.


	9. Chapter 9

**Sorry this chapter is short and kind of boring. But I kind of know where I'm going with this story now so updates should be more regular for a while and the chapters will probably be more interesting than this one. I hope you like this one anyway. Please tell me what you think!**

* * *

Ross leaves the next morning before Rachel wakes up. He doesn't really want to see her after last night. He leaves her a note saying that he had to catch an early flight home and is at the airport by 6:00am.

Once at the airport he is reminded again of how stupid this whole plan was. He came to Paris to tell Rachel he loved her and didn't even buy a ticket home. Maybe a part of him thought she'd feel the same way and want him to stay.

He asks the woman behind the desk if he can buy a ticket back to New York.

"The next flight to New York leaves in an hour." She says without any facial expression.

"Okay." Ross says. "I'll—"

The woman cuts him off. "But there are no more seats left."

Ross sighs, wondering why she told him about it if it's full. "Okay." He says again. "When's the next flight?"

"In five hours." She says without looking up from her computer.

Ross sighs again. "I'll take it."

He buys the ticket and starts wandering around the airport looking for a way to kill time.

Why does he keep letting himself do this? For years he's been getting his heart broken over and over again for a chance to be with Rachel. Why is he so attached to this idea that they're meant to be together. He keeps holding onto that and he always ends up feeling stupid for trying.

Rachel is clearly happy in her new life. He feels exactly like he did when he tried to catch her at the airport. And he's in another airport! The situation is oddly similar. Maybe he should just stop trying to get Rachel and stop going to airports. That's what always gets him feeling like this.

He hates this day. He hates Joey for convincing him to do this. And the airline for not having another flight home for five hours. And the lady selling the tickets for not caring how miserable he is. He hates everything right now. And he doesn't care if that's unreasonable.

He gets some pizza from a little Italian place in the airport and spends most of the next few hours people watching. When he finally gets on the plane he's exhausted. It's only about 11:00, but his sleep schedule is off from the time difference and he didn't sleep well after his conversation with Rachel. He rests his head against the window and watches as the plane gets further and further from the ground until all he can see is sky and clouds. Eventually he can't stay awake anymore and he falls asleep.

* * *

Hours later Ross wakes up to the sound of people getting their bags from above is head. He gets up, takes his bag, and gets off the plane. He walks out of the airport. He's back in New York. Back home.

He doesn't know if he's happy or sad to be home. He wanted to get away from Rachel to avoid any more awkwardness or her finding out the real reason he came, but he also already misses her and Emma.

He really needs to get over this. He needs to go back home, go back to work, and go back to his life. He can't spend anymore time trying to get Rachel or sulking over the fact that he can't. He needs to move on. He's just not sure how.


	10. Chapter 10

**I hope you like this chapter! Please tell me what you think!**

"It just doesn't make any sense! I mean he was gone before I even woke up!" Rachel says.

She's sitting in Nick and Matt's living room watching Emma walk around the room. She's almost two, but just recently started walking without help. She seems very pleased with herself every time she makes it from one side of the room to another.

Rachel is trying to explain to Nick what happened with Ross the night before. Matt is sitting next to Nick on the couch, working on something on his laptop, and half listening to the conversation.

"He seemed weird." Nick says. "He really didn't like me."

"And that makes him weird?" Matt asks.

Nick glances over at him and rolls his eyes. "No. But he clearly hated me."

"How can you tell?" Matt asks.

"Oh. It was so obvious! He kept giving me this look like I wasn't supposed to be there."

Rachel sighs. "It's not you. He just thought you and I were dating."

"What?!" Nick says, seemingly shocked. Matt laughs quietly at Nick's sudden reaction.

"I don't know why. I guess he just thought that 'cause we were going to dinner together we were dating."

Nick laughs. "That's ridiculous!"

"Yeah. Well, that's Ross." Rachel sighs.

"You two aren't together though. Right?" Nick asks.

"No." Rachel says. "We haven't actually dated in like seven years."

"Then why does he even care?"

"That's what I don't get! We've dated other people for years. I don't know why he'd be upset about it now." Rachel says, frustrated.

"Did you ask him?" Nick asks.

Rachel sighs. "Yeah. He wouldn't tell me why. He said he wasn't but he obviously was."

"Maybe he's protective of you 'cause you're Emma's mother." Matt suggests.

Emma smiles and runs over to Matt after hearing her name. Nick picks her up from the floor and puts her in his lap.

"Maybe." Rachel says. "And I guess he has gotten a little weird every now and then when I dated someone since Emma was born."

"I bet he's still in love with you." Nick says, very casually for what he's suggesting.

Rachel looks over at Nick, holding who's looking down at Emma in is lap seemingly unaware of Rachel's shock at what he just said. "What?"

Nick looks back at her. "Well, you know, he's protective of you, cares who you go out with, hated me 'cause he thought we were dating, randomly shows up unannounced to come see you. I mean, what's up with that? He clearly has feelings for you."

"Do you really think so?" Rachel asks.

"Well," Nick says. "I don't know the guy all that well, but it makes sense."

"So what should I do?" Rachel doesn't really know how to feel about the idea that Ross might have feelings for her.

"No idea." Nick says. "I'm pretty bad at this kind of thing." He pokes Matt's arm. "What do you think?"

Matt looks up, slightly annoyed about being interrupted. "I think you're both overthinking this. If you guys broke up, he knows you don't work as a couple. And why would his feelings be back all of a sudden? Besides, I'm pretty sure all the things he did were about him missing Emma. He's probably very protective of her and worried about her moving to a whole new country. He probably just wants to make sure she's doing well and that you're taking good care of her."

Rachel nods. "You're probably right."

After that she and Emma go home for dinner. Even long after Emma goes to bed she's thinking about what Nick and Matt said. Ross having feelings for her? It seems crazy. She knows there have been many times when they came close to getting back together, but she thought they were in a good place now where they didn't think of each other like that.

But what if he really does feel that way? Does she even feel that way about him anymore? She's not really sure. She hasn't thought about it. And she shouldn't think about it. Matt is right. She's getting all worked up over nothing. Ross isn't in love with her. He's not. There's just no way. He's just worried about his daughter. That's all.


	11. Chapter 11

**Again, I'm really sorry this chapter took so long. I just wasn't really inspired to write anything. But then I feel bad when I come back to it because people have been following and favoriting and I feel bad for making people who like it wait so long. But I do mostly know how the story will end now so I'm going to try to not go longer than a month without updating. I hope the people who like it are still interested even though it's taking me so long to get chapters up. If you are still interested, I hope you like this chapter (there will be more interesting ones coming soon) and please leave a review and tell me what you think! Also happy late Thanksgiving to anyone who celebrates it!**

* * *

For the first time ever, Ross is dreading calling Rachel so he can talk to Emma. They usually do it at least once a week but this week he's been putting it off. It's been eight days since he got back from his awful visit to Paris. He hasn't spoken to Rachel since.

Tonight everyone is meeting at Phoebe and Mike's apartment for dinner and Ross is late. His last class of the day ran late. When he finally gets there they are already eating. Everyone greets him happily and he makes himself a plate of food and sits down with them. They talk for a while about Jack and Erica and how they're adjusting to life in their new house. Monica can't stop talking about all the cute things they're doing. Eventually the conversation lands on Rachel.

"Oh. Ross." Monica says. "I forgot to tell you. Rachel called a few days ago."

Ross looks up from his pasta. "What did she say?"

"Well, she sounded worried about you. She said you were acting really weird in Paris and she wanted to know if I knew why you just showed up out of nowhere without telling her you were coming."

Ross is panicked now. Did Monica tell Rachel why he really came? How he feels? "What did you tell her!?" He practically shouts across the table.

"Woah! Calm down!" Monica says. "I didn't think it was my place to tell her why you really went. I told her I wasn't sure why you were acting weird and that I thought you were really missing Emma."

Ross relaxes in his chair and lets out a deep breath. "Oh thank god."

Monica continues. "I told her if she really wanted to know what was going on she should come here and talk to you about it face to face."

"What?!" Ross shouts.

"She's gonna bring Emma here for her birthday in a few weeks and she's hoping to talk to you then." Monica says.

"No!" Ross says. "Monica! I don't want to talk to her about it!"

"But don't you want her to know how you feel?" Phoebe asks.

"No." Ross says. "I keep trying to tell her how I feel and it always blows up in my face! I end up feeling worse. I just need to move on."

"Ross." Joey cuts in. "You've been saying that for years! And you always change your mind and go back to her."

"Exactly!" Ross says. "I can't keep doing that. It's not healthy and she doesn't even feel the same way!"

"How do you know?" Joey asks.

"'Cause I saw her in Paris." Ross says, much more quietly this time. "I saw her and she's happy there. She has friends, she loves her job, she loves the city. She doesn't need me. If she felt the same way, she wouldn't be so happy without me."

"But maybe she just hasn't thought about her feelings for you." Phoebe says. "Maybe she still loves you but she's been so busy with her new life that she hasn't realized it yet. And then when you tell her she'll realize it."

Ross rolls his eyes. "That only happens in sitcoms and dumb romance movies, Phoebe."

"Well, you're gonna have to talk to her anyway." Monica points out. "She's coming for Emma's birthday. It's too late for her to change her plans. She's already told Mom and Dad and they're so excited to see Emma."

Ross groans and puts his head in his hands. "I don't know what I'm going to do."

Phoebe puts a hand on his back trying to make him feel better. "It'll be okay, Ross." She says.

* * *

The next morning, Ross does call Rachel. He figures if she's waiting until Emma's birthday to talk, there's no sense putting off the call anyway.

She picks up after five rings. "Hello."

"Hey, Rach. It's Ross."

"Oh. Hi Ross!" She says. She sounds sort of excited.

"Hi." He says again. "Look, I'm sorry I haven't called in a while. It's been really busy at work and I just haven't had the chance."

"Oh. That's okay." She says.

"How's Emma?"

"Oh. She's doing great. She just got up from her nap. You wanna talk to her?"

"Sure." Ross says. He talks to Emma for a few minutes (even though she can't really talk much yet so it's mostly him talking to her) and he already feels a little better. Even after he and Rachel hang up, he doesn't feel as anxious about the situation with Rachel. He realizes what he really needs is to focus on Emma.

He and Rachel are Emma's parents. They have to work together to take care of her. He can't do anything to jeopardize their friendship. For Emma's sake. So he won't tell Rachel about his feelings. He can't risk her getting upset and not wanting to talk to him. He needs them to be able to raise Emma together without any awkwardness or negative feelings towards each other. And so when Rachel comes for Emma's birthday, he'll make up some dumb excuse and just hope she doesn't question it.


	12. Chapter 12

**Hi! Here's Chapter 12. I decided that since I keep taking so long to update and people are probably getting bored of this story because its taking so long, from now on I'm going to start updating once a week. (Or at least trying to.) Also I recently realized that Emma was born in April and the Friends finale aired in May which means that it being Emma's birthday a few months after Rachel goes to Paris wouldn't happen. But I've already planned out this chapter so for the purposes of this story I'm gonna say that Rachel moved to Paris in late January the year after Emma's first birthday. I hope that's not too confusing but this chapter is kind of important to the overall plot so I don't want to change it. anyway I hope you like it! Please tell me what you think!**

* * *

Rachel smiles as she watches her daughter look out the airplane window with fascination. The plane is getting closer to the ground now and she can see the buildings of New York City. It's the day before Emma's second birthday and Rachel and Emma are flying to New York.

Monica,—always the host—has offered to let them have the party at her and Chandler's house. Rachel has already heard (in great detail) about the party planning. Even though Monica's obsessive planning can be a bit annoying, it makes Rachel happy that she cares so much. She hadn't realized how much she missed her friends back in New York. She's more excited to see them than her own mother. They really are family.

Emma giggles as the plane hits the ground. Most almost two year olds would probably be frightened at the bump of the wheels hitting the ground but Emma seems rather entertained. She wiggles in her seat and tries to sit up straighter to see out the window.

Once they're off the plane and in a cab, Rachel finds herself feeling a little nervous. She doesn't really know why. She's excited to see everyone and can't wait for Emma's party, but she still has this nervous energy. She tries to push it aside for now and focus on trying to get her luggage (she definitely overpacked) and her daughter up the stairs to Joey's apartment.

She and Emma are staying with Joey. Mostly because that's where they were living before France and it's not far from Ross' place. Rachel has managed to avoid the question of why they aren't staying with Ross for the last few weeks.

After what happened in Paris, Rachel doesn't really want to be alone with Ross. Not because she's afraid of him. (He would never hurt her or anything.) Just because she doesn't want to have to deal with the awkward tension that's been left between them for the last few weeks. She knows she has to talk to him before the trip is over. But she also wants to be able to go back to Joey's if things get too awkward.

When Joey opens the door he pulls Rachel and Emma into the tightest hug either of them have ever experienced. When Joey finally lets them go Rachel laughs.

"Joey! I've only been gone a few months. You're acting like it's been years!"

Joey smiles. "It felt like years Rach! It's been so weird around here without you and Emma. Plus Monica and Chandler moved out of the city and Phoebe and Mike are always doing married people stuff so it's basically just me and Ross. And he's been super bummed out lately so he's no fun. God I missed you guys!"

Rachel frowns at him. "Ross is bummed out? Is he okay?"

Joey rolls his eyes. "Yeah. He's fine. It's just, you know, the whole thing with—" Joey stops suddenly and his eyes go wide. He laughs uncomfortably. "Nothing. You know Ross. Always upset about something." He's slowly backing away. "Anyway. I have to go do something...in my room. Yeah." He runs into his room and shuts the door.

Rachel sighs, confused. "I wonder what that was about." She says to no one in particular as she follows Emma into her old room. She starts to unpack, laying her favorite comforter on the bed and putting her It feels good to be back. As much as she loves living in Paris, this really feels like home.

* * *

Later that night, Rachel is sitting on the couch with Emma and Monica while Chandler and Joey watch TV on the other side of the room. To celebrate Rachel and Emma being back in New York, everyone is having dinner at Joey's apartment. Monica offered to cook. So far only Joey, Chandler, and Monica are there but the others should be on their way.

"You know." Monica says. "Chandler and I live the farthest away. Why are we the only ones who are here on time?"

"Because," Chandler says. "You made us leave forty minutes early."

"Well, I didn't want to be late!" Monica says. "But Ross lives right across the street! And Phoebe doesn't live that far either!"

"It's okay Mon. They're probably just—" Rachel is interrupted but the door slamming open and Phoebe running in.

"Rachel!" She shouts and running across the room to hug her friend. "I missed you so much!" Before Rachel can say anything Phoebe bends down and pick Emma up. "I miss you too!" She says. Smiling even more than before when Emma smiles back at her. "You've gotten so big!" Phoebe says.

After Phoebe puts Emma down and she and Rachel have a minute to greet each other, the door opens again. This time it's Ross. The nervous feeling Rachel had earlier immediately comes back. She really is dreading talking to Ross about whatever happened in Paris.

Once he comes in, there's a moment of awkward silence as they make eye contact. Then he smiles. "Hey Rach." He says. "It's good to see you." He opens his arms and she walks over to give him a hug. Rachel sighs. Maybe things are back to normal after all. Maybe having that talk won't be necessary.

After Ross and Rachel say hi to each other Ross spends some time with Emma and the guys by the TV while Phoebe and Rachel hang out with Monica in the kitchen. For some reason Phoebe can't stop fidgeting.

"What's up with you tonight Pheebs?" Rachel asks. "You haven't been able to sit still all night."

Phoebe smiles and looks away. "It's nothing. I really can't tell you."

"What is it Phoebe? Are you okay?" Monica asks.

"Fine!" Phoebe whisper-shouts. "I can't hold it in anymore!" She says dramatically.

"What is it?" Rachel asks.

"Okay." Phoebe says. "Mike and I were gonna tell you tomorrow at the party, but I can't wait. So when he says it at the party you guys have to promise me you'll act surprised."

"Okay." Monica says. "Just tell us."

"I'm pregnant!" Phoebe says hopping up and down with a huge smile on her face.

"Oh my god Phoebe!" Rachel squeals.

The three of them pull each other into a group hug and quickly start whispering to each other.

"How far along are you?" Monica asks.

"Almost three months." Phoebe says. "We wanted to wait to make sure the baby was healthy before we told anyone but it was so hard! I almost told you guys so many times. Like the other night when I was holding Erica or when Joey and I were having dinner last month. I mean, it's been so hard. I almost told Ross after we tried to chase you to the airport just to cheer him up when we were too late!"

There's a sudden silence. Phoebe is frozen, her eyes wide. Monica is glaring at her. Rachel looks between the two of them, confused.

"What are you talking about Phoebe?" She asks quietly.

"Uhhh." Phoebe tries to cover. "The fact that I'm pregnant! Were you even listening?" She laughs awkwardly.

"Yeah." Rachel says. "I heard that. But what about you and Ross chasing me to the airport?"

"Oh." Monica forces a laugh. "It's nothing. Phoebe doesn't know what she's talking about! She's so drunk!"

"Mon." Rachel says. "She just told us she's pregnant. She can't drink."

"Right." Monica says quietly. More to herself than to Rachel.

There's another awkward silence.

"Well," Phoebe says. "We might as well tell her now.

Monica nods. Rachel stays silent.

"Okay." Phoebe looks over at the guys who are still glued to the TV watching a basketball game before leaning in closer to Rachel and starting to explain. "The night you left for Paris, Ross realized he was still in love with you and didn't want you to go. So he and I took my grandmother's cab to the airport so he could tell you."

Rachel's eyes widen. But she still doesn't say anything.

"But," Phoebe continues. "When we got there, we realized we were at the wrong airport and it was too late."

Rachel doesn't say anything for a moment. Then she looks up at Phoebe. "Ross is still in love with me?"

Phoebe nods. "And that's also why he came to Paris! But when he saw you with that other guy he didn't tell you!" Phoebe's shock at having accidentally told Ross' secret seems to have gone away and now she's excited.

Rachel on the other hand, is so shocked she can barely move. She turns to Monica. "And that's why he was acting so weird?"

Monica nods. "We wanted to let him tell you himself. I'm sorry I didn't tell you when you asked."

"No." Rachel whispers. "It's okay. I understand. So when was he gonna tell me?"

"Well," says Monica. " He doesn't think you'll feel the same way. So after Paris he said he wasn't going to tell you."

"But now that you know, how do you feel?" Phoebe asks excitedly.

Rachel looks over at Ross, sitting in Joey's chair with Emma in his lap, bouncing her up and down to the music coming from a commercial on the TV. She looks back to Phoebe and Monica. "I don't know."


	13. Chapter 13

**I hope you like this chapter. Tell me what you think!**

Ross smiles at Rachel as they watch Emma walk around his apartment. Ross and Emma had spent the morning together and now the three of them are about to go to Monica and Chandler's house for Emma's party.

"Wow." Ross says. "She's really gotten better at walking since you guys left."

Rachel nods, still looking at Emma. "Yeah. Soon she'll be able to walk everywhere."

Ross picks up Emma and smiles when she squeals and then starts giggling.

"Well," Rachel says. "We should probably get going. You know how Monica gets when we're late."

Ross is borrowing a car from his friend so they can drive to Monica and Chandler's. It's easier than trying to fit Emma's car seat in a cab. The drive is spent in a slightly awkward silence. Rachel looks like she wants to say something but she stays quiet.

When Ross found out that Rachel was coming home for Emma's birthday and that she had told Monica she wanted to talk about what happened in Paris, he was dreading it. He came up with a bunch of excuses to not talk with her that he could use. The plan was to avoid her as much as possible. To not give her a chance to start the conversation. And not give himself a chance to tell her about his feelings. That was the plan.

But now that they are alone together, with their daughter, sitting in silence, all he wants to do is talk to her. The truth is, as much as Ross wants to avoid Rachel and pretend he doesn't love her, all he wants is to be around her. To talk to her about anything. And he wants her to know that. He wants her to know how much she means to him.

But he can't tell her. He can never tell her that he feels anything more for her than a friend would. And they are friends. Close friends. And he needs that. If there is even the smallest chance that telling Rachel how he feels could ruin that, then it isn't a chance he can afford to take. And so, he really shouldn't say anything to her. Nothing that would give her any ideas about his feelings.

* * *

But he does say something. He doesn't know why. Maybe something about watching their two year old daughter blow out her candles triggered it. The two of them made a person together. And they're raising her together. He just wishes there was a world where they could be together. And so on the drive home, with Emma asleep in the backseat, Ross starts talking.

"So Phoebe's pregnant."

Rachel looks a little taken off guard that Ross is speaking to her. The awkward tension that's built up since Rachel got to New York has kept them only talking to each other when nessesary. But she looks over at him with a (slightly forced) smile. "Yeah. Isn't it crazy?"

Ross nods. "It seems like just yesterday we found out we were having Emma."

Rachel laughs. "Oh yeah. Fun times." She says with a hint of sarcasm in her voice.

"What's that supposed to mean?" Ross asks. He says it as if he's offended but they both know he's not.

Rachel rolls her eyes. "Well, I mean, you were so shocked you couldn't even speak for the first five minutes after I told you! And then instead of talking about it you called the condom company to complain!"

Ross laughs. "And then you left!"

"Well, what was I supposed to do? Just sit there awkwardly until you were absolutely sure that the condom people understood just how upset you were?"

"I guess you're right." Ross laughs. "I acted pretty stupid. But at least we got Emma out of the whole thing."

"Yeah." Rachel agrees. "I wouldn't have it any other way."

* * *

Ross goes home that night with a warm feeling inside. Maybe he doesn't have to hide his feelings from Rachel after all. They had such a nice time talking on the way home from Emma's party. Maybe she really does feel the same way and all he has to do is tell her how he feels. Maybe the only reason she hasn't said anything is because she doesn't know that he feels the same way. That thought comforts him as he takes off his shoes and walks into the bathroom to get ready for bed. And then there's a knock at the door.

Ross slowly makes his way over to the door and opens it. On the other side of the door is Phoebe. She looks upset.

"Hey Pheebs. What's wrong?" He asks.

"Well, you know...It's just that...I just...And I know it's late...But I just felt so bad...You know?" Phoebe manages to get out.

"Phoebe." Ross says, trying to comfort her. "Calm down. You aren't saying full sentences."

Phoebe seems to have calmed down a bit after a minute and she tries again. "I have to tell you something, Ross."

"What is it?"

Phoebe takes a deep breath."Rachel knows how you feel about her."

Ross feels a mixture of emotions hit him. "What? How?" Is all he can manage.

"The other day, at Joey's, Monica, Rachel, and I were talking and I accidentally mentioned it. And I'm so sorry. Maybe it's 'cause I'm pregnant or something. I don't know. But it just slipped out. I'm sorry. But at least she knows now! We don't have to keep it a secret anymore! It's all out in the open!" Phoebe tries to smile, clearly trying to make Ross feel better.

But Ross only has one thing on his mind. "What did she say?"

Phoebe pauses like she's not sure what to say. "Well, I'm not really sure. She mostly seemed confused. She said she needed some time to think and she didn't really know how she felt."

Ross doesn't really know what to do with that. "Do you think I should say something to her?"

"No!" Phoebe insists. "She'll talk to you when she's ready. If you say anything now she'll feel pressured.

"I guess you're right." Ross sits on the couch. "I just wish I knew how she felt."

Phoebe puts a hand on Ross's shoulder. "I know."


End file.
